There is no doubt that every human has the need and a great desire for intimacy and a great love relationship with a loving partner. We want someone different from the rest to share life’s ups and downs, and to be physically close to. When a wonderful person comes along that we care about in such a way, we want to do what we can to help the relationship to grow. A love relationship is probably the most desired and rewarding of all relationships that we can have. It’s also one of the most difficult at times. Let’s look at some of the ways we can assure that we’re doing what we can to make our love relationship as rewarding as possible.
Communication in a love relationship
In any relationship whether it’s love, business, or a friendship, communication is the most important element. If two people are not communicating openly and with good understanding, there will undoubtedly be problems. And the problems can range in size from small irritants to being relationship threatening. The importance of clear and effective communication can’t be stressed enough. Here are some tips:
Say what you mean. This seems pretty obvious, but in love relationships, there sometimes seems to be a built-in fear of stating what is wanted or needed for fear of making the other person angry, or having them think you’re odd, wrong or silly. Saying what you mean does two things – it gets your wants and needs out there, and it tells your partner that you trust him or her enough to respect those wants or needs – they still might not respond in a positive way, but at least you’ve been honest and open. Saying what you mean doesn’t have to be harsh, or demanding. Simple, respectful, and loving words and tone of voice get better response.
Be open and honest. In a love relationship, there must be a feeling of transparency for both people to feel trusted and trusting. Open and honest does not mean brutal. It also doesn’t mean telling each other the things that have no consequence but could hurt. What it means is that in day-to-day life, having transparent communications will foster a feeling on both sides that they are being dealt with, with integrity.
Everyone likes to hear “I love you”, and “thank you”. Everyone likes to hear that they have special qualities. Whether you’ve been together for one year or 75 years.
Listen. Listen actively. Repeat it back so that your partner knows you heard him or her and that you understand what they’ve said. In a love relationship, active listening is as important as saying what you mean.
Intimacy in your love relationship
Intimacy is the biggest thing that separates your love relationship from all of your other relationships (assuming you are mutually monogamous). Because of that, intimacy, not just sex, but true intimacy is incredibly important.
Sex and being intimate, as in sharing little inside jokes or special songs or the ritual of a quiet moment every morning creates a strong bond.
Men and women view intimacy and sex in somewhat different ways. It’s good to understand that and be comfortable with that truth.
In the case of sex, both partners should feel comfortable enough with each other to be able to ask for what they want. And both partners should be comfortable enough, respecting of each other enough and trusting enough with each other to say, “Yes, we can try that” or “No, I’m not comfortable with that”. Do remember that sex not only brings you closer, but it’s fun and it’s OK to be adventurous if you’re both comfortable with that.
Creating time for intimacy is a requirement for a good love relationship.
Remember that intimacy includes sex, cuddling, a special look or phrase, a lovely shoulder massage and any number of other special rituals that are shared only by the two of you.
We all want love. If we want to be successful in love, we have to be certain that strong communication skills are in place, along with the bond of intimacy. These conditions for a great love relationship can be created with openness, honesty and respect. Practice these ideas and intimacy in your love relationship can be yours too.